Hi Friend,
Once upon a time, I wanted to be a movie star, a fancy photographer, a pilot. I wanted to dance on Broadway (I did). I wanted my film, Crazy Sexy Cancer, to win an Emmy (it didn’t). I’ve wanted a lot of things. Some stuff I got, others I didn’t.
Like many folks, I’ve had multiple careers, five to be exact. Then, I settled into writing and chatting with you. To be honest, I like this career the best. Why? Because it challenges me to be real, authentic and vulnerable. Those squishy qualities can be hard to share, especially publicly. After all, everyone wants to be liked. But as I approach ten years of living Crazy Sexy style and yet another book launch, what I know in my bones is this: The more I accept who I truly am, the more I shine like a diamond. This is true for you too.
Chew on this concept with me: It’s OK to accept myself unconditionally.
Here’s your affirmation: I love and accept myself exactly the way I am.
It hurts my heart to reflect back on the multiple times in my life when I felt like I wasn’t “good enough.” I was so very hard on myself. I felt like I had to jump through hoops to be loved and appreciated. Rarely was I at peace with my efforts. I know I’m not alone because I’ve coached hundreds of women who have felt the same. Funny, the few dudes who were brave enough to share their shizzle with me didn’t have these issues. But that’s another topic for another time. Our girls clearly need healthier messages.
If I could wave a magic wand and globally undo the blinding, binding words, “not good enough,” I would. But to be honest, that’s not my job. It’s yours to do it for yourself. But guess what? It’s simpler than you think.
For quite sometime now, I’ve been working on accepting myself completely. All of me. My brilliance, my so-called weaknesses, even my morning breath and most importantly, my dozens of incurable tumors. Now some might say, “But if you accept your disease (or your fill-in-the-blank), isn’t that like admitting failure?” Nope-sy. Unconditional acceptance doesn’t mean that we give up or wave the white flag, that’s quitting. Acceptance means that we let go of who we think we should be and fall in love with who we currently are.
Being at peace with what is creates a vast and holy space for healing. Remember, stress bleeds all life force. Accepting and honoring every ounce of Kris allows me to rest and renew. From that relaxed and receptive space, we gain the clarity and strength needed to create a blueprint for a happy, healthy life.
Let go.
Fall in love.
Heal.
When we accept ourselves exactly as we are, in exactly this moment, we shift from living for tomorrow to appreciating today. Acceptance heals. Rejection harms. Nurture and nourish yourself. Here’s how.
- Develop a connection to spirit
- Allow for quiet time (shhh)
- Forgive (yourself and that jerk)
- Welcome (and tend to) loving relationships
- Release unloving relationships (buh-bye emotional vampires)
- Lay in the sun
- Move your glorious body
- Eat plants (chomp, chomp, yum)
- Breathe deeply often
- Smile
- Repeat
Each time I release a book into the world, I worry. Is it good enough? And then, I remember. Acceptance. I replace my fear with my affirmation. I love and accept myself exactly the way I am (and I love and accept this fabulous creation exactly the way it is!). From that place, I can be present and soak in moments like the one I had while reading the latest issue of VegNews Magazine. Crazy Sexy Kitchen received its first rave review. Thank you, VegNews! They gushed all over the cookbook.
“With Crazy Sexy Kitchen, Carr is arming readers with a laundry list of delicious recipes…If ever there was a vegan chef fantasy team this would be it … Reading the book already feels like you are at the party with Carr and her compassionate cohorts … It’s fun, it’s edgy … Carr, Sarno, and friends have created a lasting tome that’s sure to persuade the palates of innumerable people.”
If you’re like me, you may get squeamish around compliments. You shrug them off or deflect them back to the compliment giver. “No, YOU are great. No, YOU are more great.” However, when we practice unconditional acceptance, we challenge ourselves to say two very powerful words.
“Thank you.”
As my dear friend Cheryl Richardson reminded me on the phone recently, “Life loves you, Kris.” Thank you, Cheryl.
Dear readers, life loves you too. Exactly the way you are. Today. Breathe it in. Ole!
Your turn: What would be possible if you gave yourself the same unconditional acceptance that you give to others?
Thank you for this! Life is a bit tricky at the moment and I can’t stop comparing myself to others as so many of us do – not thin enough, funny enough, smart enough, brave enough and it goes on…..! grrrrrrh. It’s exhausting and soul squashing!
Reading this made me breathe deeply, take a moment to realise that I must accept myself as I am and let go and most importantly that I must do it for myself, nobody can do it for me! 🙂
Thank you, Kris 🙂
i LOVE this article! in fact, it’s so funny, I wrote a similar article about “being enough” and self-acceptance last week on my blog. Love the new direction and design and can’t wait to receive your latest book!
Wow, such perfect timing really needed to hear this at this moment today!
Always reminded of life’s sychronicity!
Thanks!
Thank you thank you thank you, yes yes yes! Loving and accepting ourselves unconditionally helps us listen to our inner voice which helps us make decisions. The answers are all inside us and all we have to do is ask for them. I recently wrote an article called “I’m Having a Love Affair”. When we have a love affair with ourself, we get to have one everyday, no matter what. You’re wonderful Kris, I think we are all also having a love affair with you.
Ooooh, juicy!
Kris, I so needed this! Thank you for your words of wisdom that come from the heart.
Thank you Kris! I am a lost soul, who is fighting hard, to love and accept myself. You have helped me in so many ways. Your light shines bright!
Find yourself now. It’s easier than you think. You’re right there. I see you. xo kc
Acceptance is something I’ve struggled with for as long as I remember. Thanks for the encouraging words.
Your words really resonated with me – 🙂 Gonna use your affirmation daily..
Love ya – Jeanné
Your words are like a gentle breeze surrounding me! Thank you for your never ending encouragement
You are very welcome. xo
I’m 30 and am just now learning self-acceptance (’bout time!). Unfortunately, it took sickness to wake me up and sometimes I beat myself up for it – “why couldn’t I have realized this BEFORE I got sick.” Counter-productive, or what?!
My old dirty mantra of “I’m not good enough” keeps creeping back, but for every time I say thank you to a compliment, drink a green smoothie, belly laugh, smile, stretch, or do something for myself – it gets further and further away.
Thank Buddha for Kris (and Cheryl Richardson too!) for trailblazing a path of self-acceptance and self-care so I can see that it’s possible!
You made me smile Amy. x
Thank you Kris , i really needed to read this message for to face better the day .
Since i started to follow you i feel every day much better :)))
Great news! xo
Thank you Kriss! You made my day! Life does love you 🙂
So juicy. Resonates deeply as I’m in the midst of letting go of the career I’ve been striving/pushing for and leaping into new-wide-open-spacious-creative-skin. xoxo
I love u.
This is so true! How many times I´ve felt like I´m not good enought in my job, in relationships, in life itself! Is so great to read you. Than you Kriss! and I hope I can truly accept myself! Cause I´m already wonderful! xoxo
You are SO right on, Kris…I was so very hard on myself for so very long…until my IBS became severe and un-retractable. It did bleed my lifeforce right out of my hands and everything else along with it! I can tell you from experience that all the green smoothies in the world cannot rid us of our toxic thoughts, which are just as harmful as a big mac and fries! I’m on a slow but sure healing path now and can’t wait for your cookbook as one of my tools toward well-being! THANK YOU:)
You are spot on Ali. Stay the acceptance course. 🙂 xo
Thanks for your insiring words..I often feel its difficult to love myself!!
I am working on this EVERYDAY!!!!
GOD BLESS!!!!!
Needed to be reminded of this today! Thanks so much!!
WHAT a great writer you are! Just beautiful. You’re helping change the world. One beautiful word after another. Thank you for being such an amazing inspiration to folks like me who also struggle with such personal battles with health and other life complications!
Thank you Elle12. Much love to you. 🙂
Kris you are like a lighthouse guiding a path of awesomeness! I started reading your blog back in July and enjoy every ounce of positive inspiration you offer. I, like many others, was one to beat myself up on a fairly consistent basis. Thank you for your sunshine, wisdom, and strength. It makes me want to jump on my unicorn, saddle up, and shine!